Playing Is Much More Than Just Playing!

Our third and final entry on chapter 7 was written by Katie. She really related to the games and play discussed in this chapter, and this might be because she did a lot of wonderful playing as a child. Read on to share her childhood play memories.

In the seventh chapter, Elkind focuses on the idea that playing is not simply to have fun, but a critical part of childhood which helps to develop necessary social interactions such as cooperation, competition, and taking initiative within a group. It is the common idea that play is a child’s work, and it is through play that a child learns the majority of their abilities and interpersonal skills.

Middle childhood describes the ages in which game-playing with specific rules takes effect and children become fixated on right and wrong, following the rules and/or breaking the rules. These children deal with a desire to play the “right way” whether that is with a board game, physical rough and tumble game, or a hand-clapping game. I remember when I was young that I greatly valued rules! I was the child who would object and let the entire group know if someone was cheating or not playing some part of the game correctly. Little did I know, by my constant objections and tattling here and there, I was in fact learning how to deal with people when I did not agree with something.

I see eye-to-eye with Elkind’s view on forts, and how they are a place for children to develop who they are. Growing up, my two older brothers and I were master fort builders! We used anything and everything from couch pillows to desks, and from bed sheets to chairs. Our forts were not simple everyday one-room hideaways, but were intricate spaces with separate rooms, places to sleep and eat, and areas to actually stand up in! When we built, we built with a purpose – to have our own space, a secret space free from others (unless of course our rules allowed for others to enter). My brothers and I learned a lot about gravity by securing things in place with heavy objects, but we also learned to cooperate and work together; we did a lot of trial-and-error and eventually learned that six hands made light work. To this day, I can still remember coming home from school and wanting to find solitude in my fort.

Some of my favorite memories are of playing on my street with the other neighborhood kids. We played everything from Power Rangers to kickball, and cooperation and communication were key! Did anyone ever want to be picked last when choosing teams? No, but we always seemed to make a point of including those who were picked last and making them feel wanted (I would know, because every now and then I would be chosen last). Yet, those who were chosen last at kickball would be chosen first at Cops and Robbers; the rotation was ever-changing, and our feelings never seemed to get hurt because we knew we were better at something else. This is exactly what adults and teachers need to be focusing more on nowadays, making sure that children feel competent and successful with at least one thing.

How we as adults, parents, and teachers react to childhood games is crucial! Not only should we be “structuring the situation rather than structuring the activity” (p. 159), but we should also be more accepting and understanding of the influence games have in children’s lives – and in ours. For example, we have all played hide-and-seek and hid in a neighbor’s bush or behind their tree. As adults or “that neighbor,” we need to be accepting of their desires to play even if we are not crazy about them trampling all over our perfect lawns. My dad was the first to tell us not to play on our front lawn, yet he would give us alternatives and tell us our limits, without restricting our play, and in effect not becoming that mean neighbor to the other neighborhood kids.

Children are going to create, invent, and problem solve in order to play some game and enjoy their afternoon. They will learn from playing, and playing with others will in fact teach them necessary attributes for their future (things not learned through playing videogames day in and day out). Elkind says it best when he states that while “playing these self-initiated games is fun, it also helps children learn the interpersonal skills needed to become effective social beings” (p. 145).