Bringing It All Together

This is Leslie, the author of our final entry, when she was a baby. Now, as an adult, she has FOUR children, and these are two of them -- her youngest, AJ, and her oldest, Alysha.


This is how she introduced me to her family: "AJ is my youngest, he keeps me busy. Alysha is the oldest and she is so much help. Since my children and I are all in school, we do homework together and we are very competitive when it comes to grades. My husband, Anthony Sr., works at night, and I work days and school in the evening. It’s a crazy schedule but it works for us. My 2nd daughter is Serenity, she is the peace maker of the house and keeps everyone laughing. Aleiya (Nae-Nae) is my 3rd daughter, she is very loving and tells me everyday how much she adores me. My 4th daughter and the reason I continue to keep pushing is my angel baby Sa’Ryah. She is and was our gift. Although we only got to keep her for 7 months (SIDS) she continues to impact our everyday lives."
Clearly, family is very important to Leslie, and you'll see how important play is to her, too, in her entry here. Enjoy!

During our weekly quiz, Dr. Reid’s iClicker stopped working. This incident forced us to use a piece of paper and a pen to answer the quiz questions. In a day and time when technology rules everything, it is hard to imagine a time when it was not around. Elkind begins chapter nine by acknowledging the power of technology in our classrooms. He stated that in times past, it was the teachers who brought materials into the classroom. Now, students come to class with a variety of learning “materials,” i.e. iPods, cell phones and mp3 players (p.195). He states that they only enrich subjects being covered in class. Technology has transformed the way we learn. Elkind refers to this as “The new Educational Reality” (p.197).

Elkind explores John Dewey’s method of teaching students. When John Dewey envisioned the ways students learn, he felt they learn best when they are challenged by a project. He termed it “The Project Method” of learning. His method combined creativity, self-motivation, and practical learning - play, love and work (p.196). John Dewey felt this is an effective way for students to learn. Although Dewey felt students learn best when they are engaged in an activity, he did not object to original teaching methods. Elkind feels this is what new technology in the classroom is allowing students to do. Students have their own pod casts, they are able to communicate with the teacher via electronic mail and even have classroom blogs. Blogs, can you believe it? Elkind explains that for Dewey, writing at the beginning of the 20th century prepared students to learn skills needed to survive in the industrial age. Using technology to learn enables students to learn skills needed to survive and succeed in the information age (p.197).

I loved elementary school. Not only did I enjoy learning new things, I loved the competition it invoked. I remember classroom competitions. We would earn prizes for the class who scored highest on the weekly spelling test, or who read the most books in a month. Every January we had put on a play to honor Dr. Martin Luther King; after all, the school was named after him. I can remember meeting new friends just by working alongside them when we were practicing our parts for the play. Things seemed much simpler then. Recess was only fourteen minutes but the fun kept going long after we returned to class. We did not have much technology. I can remember when we started using computers at school. The disks were the size of Frisbees! They would put the huge disk in a drive and it would read us a story. The headphones were massive. You could feel every bit of its weight on the top of your head. Going to the media center was a privilege and only select groups of students were allowed to go. I felt special to say the least. My favorite game on the computer was “Word Munchers.” I would munch and munch those misspelled words as if they had attacked me personally. I did not realize that was the beginning of the (much-anticipated) computer-age.

On the other hand, my children live in a much different world. They really do not remember a time without technology. Technology rules everything. Their classrooms and the curriculum are based on technology. They have assignments where they have to do internet research. They are required to comment on student news, a pod cast produced by CNN. They also have classmates and friends in other states that they keep in contact with on a monthly basis via Skype. Although technology is used at the forefront of their classrooms, they are still required to read textbooks and complete at least 2 hours of homework every evening. They are still involved in church activities, softball and peer mediation. This is possibly the point Elkind has been trying to convey to us throughout his book. Allowing students to learn in an environment that allows them to play only enriches their ability to learn. It must be conducive to their level of learning and not forced. I do agree that certain toys and games are geared towards pushing children to learn too soon and/or too fast. I believe children can become confused and frustrated when they are trying to learn a subject that they are not ready for. A child in Kindergarten learning geometry is ludicrous. Yet, many kindergarten teachers are pushing a curriculum that is too hard for their young students. Some school districts no longer allow recess and have taken out much of the extra-curricular activities that allow children to interact and implement a project-learning curriculum. As a parent, I look forward to Christmas plays and multi-cultural fairs that many schools still present. Not only do the children benefit but the parents benefit as well.
Elkind states that the combining of play, love and work is the means of successful academic achievement. Research given by psychologist Sara Smilansky also proves this theory. Smilansky studied children engaging in “socio-dramatic” play. This type of interaction promotes positive, intellectual and social development. Her study concluded that socio-dramatic play activates resources that stimulate emotional, social and intellectual growth in the child, which affects the way the child learns in school (p. 211).

Technology in the classrooms has only enhanced the ways in which children play. Allowing children to Skype, email and run their own pod-casts has broadened the concept of play. Nevertheless, person-to-person interaction continues to be that link that helps children develop socially; not the latest video game, but simply two children playing together. Children will soon have to face the many obstacles associated with just being a kid. Of course, we all want our children to be the next Einstein. I believe if we allow our children the space and time needed to grow, instead of Einstein, we may be raising the next President of the United States, or better yet, the next Dr. Reid.

The Final Chapter

Wow...I can't believe it. We have completed the entire book, and I'm now posting the first of two entries on our final chapter! This first part of our finale is coming to us from Jessica, and I think you'll enjoy reading her thoughts on our changing world and the role of play in the lives of modern children.

In Chapter 9 of Elkind’s book, he continues the discussion of combining play, love and work as the means of successful academic achievement. Elkind focuses on the school system, its past, present and constant changes throughout the years.

In today’s society, technology is growing at a record pace. Teachers today have to deal with cell phones, laptops, iPods, and social networks that seem to preoccupy the current culture. Looking back through my school years, it is now odd to see what kids are into today. I was 21 years old when I received my first cell phone. I have recently talked with a friend who was in the process of getting her 5-year-old daughter a cell phone. She also mentioned I should add her to my Facebook (I don’t even have a page). But, the point is, why are we so obsessed with our kids keeping up? Their focus should not be on technology; they should also have a grasp of the real world.

Although there are some negatives to technology, there are also many benefits. Nothing can stop us from receiving information, because all we have to do is “Google.” Students are now able to use current technological tools to help their education. It is a great opportunity for students and teachers to evolve in the manner their curriculum is being learned and discovered.

Elkind mentioned a few different schools that seem to have more heart in the manner their students are being taught. The problem is: Not everyone can afford Montessori or Waldorf schools. People who live in lower to middle class income communities should have confidence in the schools their children go to. But, the reality remains that many people have lost faith in the manner the school system is currently structured.

A shift in the system also occurred when I was going through the school system as a child. I recall my Wednesday junior high music class being cut short in the middle of the school year, due to budget cuts. This class was the one reason I loved to go to school in the first place. It was a different way of learning for me that I truly enjoyed and it planted the seed for my interest in music years later. Music and the Arts are the first subjects to get cut. School systems are now test-driven. The school’s funding may depend on scores, which add unnecessary pressure to students and teachers. Elkind mentioned in his book that this type of structured academia might cause anxiety and low self-esteem in students.

There are ways parents can still help their children. Elkind states, “Despite the public schools, it is possible for parents to give their children educational experiences that speak to their hearts, minds and bodies” (p. 213). I agree with Elkind and the suggestions he gave. For example, in the game The Dumb Books Caper, at a time with test-driven curricula, schools are not allowing students to think outside the box. This game gives students a chance to question the accuracy of textbooks. In E is for Ending, the child is allowed to come up with an alternate ending to a story. This helps the child be creative and helps them understand that writing can be open and flexible. This enables children to think of possibilities, instead of just limits.

Now parents must be more involved in their child’s school experience more than ever before. Although technology is useful and stimulating, parents need to encourage their children to enjoy the outdoors in order to be in touch with the natural world and reality.

One Grain of Rice

This is Marilyn Monroe...er, I mean, La! She wrote our third entry on chapter 8, and you can see that she has a sense of humor, which is obviously appropriate for this chapter! Enjoy.

Elkind’s suggestion to use humor as a form of child rearing is very interesting. It is easy to understand that humor integrates play, love, and work. However I feel that it is important to use humor when it is necessary. As Elkind has pointed out in his book, humor can be used to discipline a child. Using humor to discipline avoids focusing on the negative emotions and instead concentrates on the positive. An example Elkind gave was how his son, Paul, forgot to take the dog out in the afternoon while he and his wife were out. When they got home, Elkind discovered this, and rather than shouting and screaming, he imitated a popular TV program and released his anger in a way that he believed was humorous.

I feel that in using humor, you don’t deal with the real problem that needs to be dealt with. When Paul’s incident occurred, instead of using I-messages or effectively talking to work out the problem, Elkind expressed his anger in a way that attacked his son’s character or personality. I felt that learning what is wrong was not effective in this situation because Paul was not disciplined for what he had done wrong. Instead, Elkind used humor to ease the situation, and this tells the child that being irresponsible is acceptable. It’s true that Elkind did not attack his son’s ego, but was he able to effectively show his son that he was angry?

On the other hand, humor can do more than one thing for a child. It teaches the child to laugh, be happy, and be imaginative. Riddles can be used as humor to teach the child how to be imaginative. One riddle that struck me was, “What has four legs and goes tick tock? A watchdog” (p. 173). Even I did not know the answer, and when I read the answer I was amazed at how creative that was. Riddles are funny and a child can learn to use different ideas of how to solve a situation. Riddles are great for children because they are easy to memorize and usually very catchy. They can also discover different vocabulary words and views of things in their life.

Sharing our passions is something that I feel is very important. Teaching with passion is extremely different from just teaching a subject. When you listen to the way someone talks about a subject, you can tell how they feel about the subject by the tone they use when they talk about it. I recall a time when we were younger; we went to the farm everyday with my mom. That was a time when Hmong people all wanted to have fresh grown rice. My mom and aunts and uncles were all very excited about planting acres of rice because growing rice brought back the memories of them in their homelands. This therefore made us, as children, very enthusiastic about helping them out with planting, growing and the processing of making the freshly grown rice. Through this, we learned a lot together about the careful planting of the seeds and processing of the rice because our parents were teaching us with passion.

Play and Parenting

This is Emiley, the author of our second entry on chapter 8. She said, "As far back as I can remember, every summer, my parents, brother, aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents would all go together on a summer vacation to the beach for about a week. Now, since I'm older, I value my family time and realize how lucky I am to have a family that likes to do things together." Emiley has shared a few other family examples and compared them with Elkind's ideas about parenting. Happy reading!

Elkind describes lighthearted parenting as “parents making an ongoing effort to integrate play, love, and work into their child rearing practices” (p. 171). Parents accomplish this by using humor to socialize and discipline, by sharing their passions, and by establishing patterns of family play, games, and experience sharing.
In the beginning of the chapter, Elkind mentions the importance of toddlers needing to develop a number of expectations that parents can encourage with laughter. An example of this is putting on a silly hat or changing your voice when reading a story. Elkind expresses that these examples are the unexpected things that children find funny. For the development of a child, I agree with Elkind. However, on page 177, Elkind uses discipline with humor in a manner I do not agree with. An example that Elkind gives is Mom and Dad leaving their 12-year-old son home alone while they ran errands. The son’s only job was to make sure the dog went outside to relieve itself. When Mom and Dad came back and saw the “mess” on the carpet, Dad was upset. Dad wanted to yell at the son but instead he balled up his fist and pounded his palm and said, “To the moon, Paul.” This was a way for Dad to get his anger out and feel humored at the same time instead of making a big deal about it.

This incident reminded me of a similar, personal experience. When I was growing up, we had a rule of no eating or drinking in the living room because we just got new carpet. Well, I didn’t think that I was going to spill my soda, so I brought it in the living room despite the rule. My dog ended up knocking the cup off of the coffee table and the soda spilt. As I tried to clean up the mess, my mom walked in. Mom looked at me and said, “This is why we have rules. I’m mad that you did not follow them.” I felt bad for what I did and apologized to my mom. She assured me that the carpet would look like new after it dried. In this case, my mom did not use humor to discipline me, and I think that this is an alternative that I prefer to use instead of humor. I don’t think it is bad if you express what you actually feel to your child. However, I think it should be done in a manner where it doesn’t put down the child’s character or directly attack them. In lighthearted parenting, Elkind believes that the outcome of humor discipline is an “effective and constructive way of handling their emotion” (p. 178). I think that showing your emotions and explaining why you feel the way you do could have the same outcome.

Elkind also mentions that there are other ways to express lighthearted parenting. This could be sharing our passions with our kids and making time for our families. Elkind states, “One of the best ways of ensuring that our children both play and develop lifelong habits of play is to share our personal passion with them” (p. 182). Some examples of this that the book lists are fishing, gardening, golfing, etc. When growing up, I experienced this because my grandmother often shared her passions with me. I spent a lot of time with her after school when my parents worked late. My grandmother loved to work on her oil paintings in the evenings before dinner. I always showed an interest in what she did. Eventually, she bought me my own canvas, stand, paint and brushes and showed me some of her techniques. I value this time that I shared with my grandmother and I loved being able to spend that time “playing” with her. It’s a lifelong passion that I will always have. As Elkind concluded, “When we share experiences with our children, we come to appreciate them as individuals and give them the freedom to be the best that they can be” (p. 193). I feel that this quote is something from which everyone can learn.

Avoiding Parenting Traps

Our first entry for chapter 8 was written by Chai. She has shared interesting insight into her own parents' interactions with her as a child, and ways that she would like to parent now. Happy reading!

After reading Chapter 8 of Elkind, I started thinking of my family. Was my family a happy or unhappy family? Did my parents integrate play, love, and work into my everyday life? Did my parents use parenting techniques that made child rearing easy and effective? Were my parents lighthearted? I would say that there were times when the family was happy and times when the family was unhappy. I say this because play, love, and work did not exist in my everyday life growing up. There were times when my parents seemed lighthearted, but then, they weren’t. For example, I actually wished for my parents, especially my father, to not be so serious sometimes and have some humor to light up everyone’s faces when giving the family a lecture. Every time my father gathered everyone to have a talk, everyone in the room was silent except my father.

When I read about “how parents can use a sense of humor to bring play, love, and work into everyday child rearing” (p.171), I noticed that humor wasn’t used much by my parents when I was growing up, especially when we were out in the public. My parents were caught in the trap Elkind called “egocentric trap.” My parents only thought about themselves and how others would think of them. They did not think about how my siblings and I were feeling or thinking. I don’t want to get caught in the trap someday.

I believe that using humor is a great way to bring play, love, and work into a child’s everyday life, but I need to understand that the kind of humor I use on a three year old wouldn’t be the same kind of humor I would use on a thirteen year old. For example, I can probably make faces and change my tone of voice to make a three year old laugh, but when doing the same to a thirteen year old, the thirteen year old may just think that I’m weird.

I think that disciplining a child with humor is a great idea. It is a great idea because the anger that is built up in the parent is not directed at the child. The anger that was built up is brought out in a way that just brings laughter. I agree with Elkind that by disciplining using humor, parents accomplish goals which “manage negative feelings in a positive and constructive way, provide children an effective and constructive way of handling their own emotions, and provide a healthy model of parenting for children to use when they themselves have children” (p.178).

Humor is a great way to bring play, love, and work into a child’s everyday life, but I believe that sharing passions, sharing by example, supporting the child’s passions, having family time, and sharing experiences bring play, love, and work into a child’s everyday life also. By sharing my passion, my child will know what kind of activities in which I like to engage. Instead of sharing my passion directly, I may share by example. My child will see what kind of activities I enjoy doing by seeing me participate in the activities. Sometimes, children have different passions from their parents and I think parents should encourage children in whatever passion they have. For example, my niece loves to draw pictures. My sister can encourage my niece by supplying my niece with drawing supplies. I believe that the best time to share passions and experiences is during family times when the family is together.

Playing Is Much More Than Just Playing!

Our third and final entry on chapter 7 was written by Katie. She really related to the games and play discussed in this chapter, and this might be because she did a lot of wonderful playing as a child. Read on to share her childhood play memories.

In the seventh chapter, Elkind focuses on the idea that playing is not simply to have fun, but a critical part of childhood which helps to develop necessary social interactions such as cooperation, competition, and taking initiative within a group. It is the common idea that play is a child’s work, and it is through play that a child learns the majority of their abilities and interpersonal skills.

Middle childhood describes the ages in which game-playing with specific rules takes effect and children become fixated on right and wrong, following the rules and/or breaking the rules. These children deal with a desire to play the “right way” whether that is with a board game, physical rough and tumble game, or a hand-clapping game. I remember when I was young that I greatly valued rules! I was the child who would object and let the entire group know if someone was cheating or not playing some part of the game correctly. Little did I know, by my constant objections and tattling here and there, I was in fact learning how to deal with people when I did not agree with something.

I see eye-to-eye with Elkind’s view on forts, and how they are a place for children to develop who they are. Growing up, my two older brothers and I were master fort builders! We used anything and everything from couch pillows to desks, and from bed sheets to chairs. Our forts were not simple everyday one-room hideaways, but were intricate spaces with separate rooms, places to sleep and eat, and areas to actually stand up in! When we built, we built with a purpose – to have our own space, a secret space free from others (unless of course our rules allowed for others to enter). My brothers and I learned a lot about gravity by securing things in place with heavy objects, but we also learned to cooperate and work together; we did a lot of trial-and-error and eventually learned that six hands made light work. To this day, I can still remember coming home from school and wanting to find solitude in my fort.

Some of my favorite memories are of playing on my street with the other neighborhood kids. We played everything from Power Rangers to kickball, and cooperation and communication were key! Did anyone ever want to be picked last when choosing teams? No, but we always seemed to make a point of including those who were picked last and making them feel wanted (I would know, because every now and then I would be chosen last). Yet, those who were chosen last at kickball would be chosen first at Cops and Robbers; the rotation was ever-changing, and our feelings never seemed to get hurt because we knew we were better at something else. This is exactly what adults and teachers need to be focusing more on nowadays, making sure that children feel competent and successful with at least one thing.

How we as adults, parents, and teachers react to childhood games is crucial! Not only should we be “structuring the situation rather than structuring the activity” (p. 159), but we should also be more accepting and understanding of the influence games have in children’s lives – and in ours. For example, we have all played hide-and-seek and hid in a neighbor’s bush or behind their tree. As adults or “that neighbor,” we need to be accepting of their desires to play even if we are not crazy about them trampling all over our perfect lawns. My dad was the first to tell us not to play on our front lawn, yet he would give us alternatives and tell us our limits, without restricting our play, and in effect not becoming that mean neighbor to the other neighborhood kids.

Children are going to create, invent, and problem solve in order to play some game and enjoy their afternoon. They will learn from playing, and playing with others will in fact teach them necessary attributes for their future (things not learned through playing videogames day in and day out). Elkind says it best when he states that while “playing these self-initiated games is fun, it also helps children learn the interpersonal skills needed to become effective social beings” (p. 145).

Play is the Child's Work

Our second entry on chapter 7 was written by Stefani. You'll see when you read her entry that she recognized many types of play discussed by Elkind because she engaged in them during her childhood. I think you'll enjoy her recollections of childhood play, as well as her insight into its importance.

In chapter seven of Elkind’s book, the author discussed the importance of play and how it helps children become effective social beings. While reading the different sections that deal with various ways of playing, I was reminded of my own childhood. Elkind states, “Games provide a set of rules that govern how to behave under certain circumstances” (p.148). I agree with Elkind and it brings back the memories of when I used to play an original game we called “Alligators and Pirates” with my grandmother. I used to play this game with my younger cousin, Kala, and my grandmother at our family cabin in Oakhurst, CA. Kala and I would sit on the swing, which was our “Pirate Ship,” with Nana. We would have to run (pretend to swim fast) to the jacuzzi deck (the island) without actually stepping on the deck wood, only on the rugs which were pretend rocks. We had to hop from rug to rug to make it to the jacuzzi deck, and back again to the boat to be safe. If we stepped off the rugs, then we were eaten by the alligators in the water. Nana would be safe on the swing with her feet up out of the water and encourage us to run fast and not to fall in the water. Then we could make it safely back to the home ship with her on the swing. When we did make it back to the swing, Nana would hug and kiss us because we survived the “alligators and the deep water.” We continued to play this game for years every time I went up to my grandparents’ cabin. I still sit on the swing when I go up there and we joke about not letting the alligators get us.

I agree with Elkind that when children play games with rules, they come to understand the social rules which make cooperation with others possible. Kala and I would take turns running to the island, and we would encourage one another to make it back to the swing safely. A child begins to develop social skills through games with rules. I also believe that children can learn healthy cooperation and competition through games. I liked how this chapter gave many different examples of play and how each area of play helps the child grow in many acceptable ways.

When Elkind talked about “Play Acting,” it reminded me of when I was little and would play with all my dolls. I would put all my baby dolls on a blanket and pretend to drive them all to school and kiss them goodbye. I was reenacting what I witnessed my mother do when she would drive us around and take us to all our different activities. I was pretending to be someone that I was not, and putting myself in someone else’s position like Elkind talked about. I used to spend hours playing every day. I believe that play is extremely powerful in kids’ development.

After reading this chapter, it made me want to go play some games and just have fun, to be child-like again. I know that all the hours I spent playing made me have such a fun and happy childhood, and I recognize that it also contributed to my now having a healthy adulthood. I could think of so many examples in each area of play that I used to do. Now after reading this book, I want to always encourage my nieces to play just like my grandmother did with me, and always make sure they are having fun. I never knew there were so many different kinds of play, and how each one helps the child develop skills that they will need when they grow up. I think play is a child’s daily work.

It Isn't Only a Game: The Role of Play in Becoming Social

This is Emily, the author of our first entry on chapter 7. She said, "I combined dressup and playing with play dough, two of my favorite activities, while I was visiting my grandmother. I was around 4 when this picture was taken." You'll see in Emily's entry here that, not only did she get to engage in some great play as a child, but she feels passionately about the importance of play in the lives of all children. Enjoy!

Children spend a large portion of childhood playing games. Games help develop socialization, cooperation and competitive skills. As children get older they have less time to spend engaging in self-initiated play.

Elkind discusses three classifications that childhood games fit into. Games are considered steady, recurrent or new. Steady games are “continuous over time like cards and hide-and-seek” (p. 147). Recurrent games “disappear and then reappear at a later time” (p. 147). New games arise from “new stories or films” (p. 147). An example would be Cartoon Tag because it is based on the most current cartoon programs that children watch. Over time games may vary, but the basic goals of steady or recurrent games stay the same. For example the goal of hide-and-seek is to be the last person found by the seeker. Changes may occur in location or a tag aspect may be added to the game, but the goal is still the same.

According to Elkind, games “provide a set of rules that govern how to behave under certain circumstances” (p. 148). Children have to decide the person to be “it,” where bases are located, and other aspects pertaining to how the game operates. The ability to determine how a game will function helps children develop leadership and cooperation skills. Elkind suggests teaching young people to “compete with themselves and cooperate with others…[which helps focus them on] improving… [their] own performance rather than besting another child” (p. 160). I have mixed feelings about Elkind’s belief on this matter. I believe children should focus on improving themselves, but learning to compete with others is also important. For example: As adults they must compete with others for promotions at work. If they never learn to compete with others as children they may not be able to advance in society. I agree with Elkind because too much competition has the ability to breed added aggression and animosity among children.

Elkind discusses changes that occur in relation to kinship play during middle childhood. Thinking about the way children tend to interact solely with same sex children reminded me of the friends that I had during middle childhood. Many of Elkind’s ideas about the rules that children develop for interaction applied when I was a young child. I surrounded myself mostly with female friends. While I did have male friends, I rarely interacted with them unless I was with at least one of my female friends. Recalling the interactions of other age groups, similar to mine, closely resembled the interactions that I experienced with my friends.

Through games, children develop different types of rule mastery: age, moral, and verbal. I believe that mastering rules is an invaluable skill for children because as they age and gain understanding about the creation of rules, they are better able to function in society. Society is based on rules. Children who understand the importance and need for rules are more likely to succeed in school, friendships, and are better prepared for adult interactions.

I agree with Elkind’s thoughts regarding playacting and therapeutic play. It is important for children to try different roles that are both positive and negative, so that they are able to grasp the idea of what is involved in each role. Having space to play is essential as is developing a sense of belonging among peers. These developmental aspects commonly advance through play.

Adults commonly overlook the importance of childhood games. Elkind believes that adults only notice children’s games when they annoy them. Adults should pay more attention to the amount of time that their children are spending playing games. Games advance development of imperative skills, and allow children to socialize with one another. Adults should recognize that today’s children are losing playtime and simplify children’s schedules to allow more time for play.

My Apologies to Christina!

I am afraid that I failed to post our last entry on chapter 5! Christina submitted an entry, and it got lost in the shuffle (and if you've seen my desk lately, you've seen there's a LOT of shuffle there!).

I apologize to Christina, but here it is...so, though Lai's chapter 6 entry has already been posted, Christina's entry will remind you of chapter 5!

“Love is a Better Teacher”

Elkind begins the second section of his book by exploring the common misunderstandings of how young children learn. As Elkind explores this topic, he asserts there are three core types of misunderstandings. First, Elkind notes one misunderstanding to be the “Watch Me” Theory of Learning and Instruction. In reading about this type of instruction, what first struck me was how often I see it occur. It’s common to hear parents coaching their children with such words as, “No, no, you’re doing it wrong. Do it like me.” I’ve noticed many parents hold their child to the expectation of learning something new only through forced observation. Elkind points out that under this theory of instruction, children are not allowed to guide their own learning. Instead, they are robbed of the freedom to explore what interests them most, and are forced to focus on what the instructor wants them to follow. Elkind comments, “If these young people were bored and unmotivated, it is not because they were lazy or lacked interest in learning. They were bored and unmotivated because they had been taught that their interests and passions were of little value” (p. 95). I feel this particular notion is extremely important. As a society, we often quickly and incorrectly “diagnose” these children who are viewed as unmotivated or bored with some sort of learning disorder, lumping them in with those who suffer from things such as ADHD. While this may be the easier solution, I feel it’s imperative that we examine our teaching methods and discover the true reason why these kids are struggling. As Elkind points out, often this boredom and lack of motivation is just a result of the restrictions we place on their freedom to explore their own interests and passions.

The second misunderstanding Elkind explores is the “Little Sponge” Theory of Learning and Instruction. As I read Elkind’s account of taking his children to the circus, I was reminded of an instance I experienced with my three year old niece in our local Build A Bear Workshop. I was more than excited to share her first “bear making experience” with her. As we entered the store, I carried with me expectations of her being completely absorbed in the whole process, from the first puff of fluff to putting the finishing touches on her new friend’s outfit. While she was excited, to my surprise she was much more interested in the little things that I was quick to deem boring and insignificant. She was less concerned about finding the perfect pair of shoes to match the outfit (I had chosen), and more concerned with exploring the pictures that were on the box they give you for free to put your new friend in! Elkind notes, “Infants and young children dawdle because they are looking at the world with fresh eyes and ears. They are caught up and excited by much that we take for granted and no longer find of interest” (p. 98). I had somewhat of an “Aha!” moment after reading this idea. Of course children aren’t interested in the same things we are; their concept of the world is completely different than ours! It’s crucial that this idea is understood when applied to instruction. Children are not interested in the same things we are, and they do not learn in the same manner that we do.

Elkind’s third misconception is the “Look Harder” Theory of Learning and Instruction. This is the belief that if children were to just look harder, they would be able to understand concepts that they aren’t able to comprehend. Elkind draws the analogy of speaking louder to someone who speaks a foreign language because they don’t understand English. Elkind stresses that it’s important to understand that children do not see the world in the same way adults do.
Elkind goes on to discuss different types of play. It is through these types of play that children truly learn and develop best. An interesting comment Elkind makes towards the end of the chapter is, “Young children live in a world that is engineered for the minds and bodies of adults” (p. 113). As I reflected on this particular statement, I came to realize how important it is to really understand that children have a completely different view of the world. As educators, we need to embrace this view, allowing them to learn through play and giving them the freedom to explore their own passions and interests.